Challenge Yourself

Today I want to part away from the usual ramblings of fashion and decor. Today it's something very deep, and sad. A serious subject that in my opinion, blogger or not.. this is a challenge we should all do, and take part in. I am writing this from the bottom of my heart, and with nothing short of brutal honesty. I don't know what will come out, but.. you've been advice. If you're looking for pretty light hearted funny stuff. Today's not it. Sorry. But this is just too serious and important in my opinion.

It's with a heavy heart that I say that Millie Gears has passed. I did't really know her. I saw her around, and saw her plurks, heard about her, read her blog. Still, her death comes as a surprise. It's always sad to see a good person go so soon. So undeserved. And I kick myself in the ass every moment when I think about this. Why? I lost the opportunity to get to know someone wonderful, a person that filled so many lives in SL with such joy and beauty. I'm truly sorry that I let some sort of twisted perception of shyness get in the way of this. 

Natalee Oodles, one of my closest friends, has actually started a challenge in memory of Millie. I find this to be beautiful, and fitting, and if I were to die, it would be nothing but an honor for people to think of me this way. Instead of mourning the loss, trying to move forwards, and inspire others to do the same. I'm in tears when I say this is the most beautiful memorial you can give a person. Thank you Nat, you've started something that hopefully will inspire many more to do the same, and make Millie's footstep in this world never fading. The challenge can be found here, along with Natalee's very heart felt post. With that said.. we're supposed to say what we're thankful for, and what we would change, or rather improve in ourselves. So.. I'll start.

What am I thankful for? I'd say life, but.. Natalee already said that. Instead, I'm going to say every single meaningful moment that I have with my friends and family. I can't help but to feel like I have a clock ticking away, that will soon run out, doctors don't really help with that. But it's because of this.. that every moment I laugh with a friend, every moment I hug my husband, when we kiss, when I get to see my sister, when I hear my father laughing, when I tell my mother how much I love her.. that's what I'm thankful for. In a world with so much hate and ugliness, there can be so much beauty found. I never understood what my father felt when he was given two months to live. Granted, it's been ten years, but.. that burden, that need to make everything be worthwhile. Or my grandmother's words in what was basically her death bed, unity, love.. I cherish all of that, and I now fully understand them. When you see someone.. instead of hurting them, of breaking them down, tell them just how much they mean to you. How much you love them. Let Millie be a lesson to all of us, why waste time in bitterness? They could be gone tomorrow. You could be gone tomorrow. Instead of doing this, build them up, share a moment that will cherish for a lifetime. No matter how long or short that lifetime is. 

As for what I need to improve on? Lord.. there's so much. For one, I'm done with negativity. Really. Done. Why waste our time saying this person is that, or this.. when.. really, does it even matter? If you're not going to help that person become a better them.. then why fill yourself with such poison? The gossiping among friends, or others.. the crap we spread around, and how it makes us feel that there's some sort of entitlement to the way we feel. Like for example, when we see someone wearing something we hate, and we bash them for it! Most of us do it, I know this for a fact, but.. what's really the point? At the end of the day, all we could be doing is hurting someone. And what's so good about that? Nothing really. It makes us into the same type of people that we hate. I'm done with this. No more. I'm done with shyness too. I usually feel like I'm either not good enough, or too good for someone. Bullshit. Seriously, Normally I don't cuss in my blog, but that's just bullshit, Sasha. Everyone here is an equal, with different tastes, needs, desires. Who are we to say what's right and wrong? No one. The sad truth is that we're no one. So what am I going to do about this? I'm dropping it all. Clean slate for everyone, and anything. Whatever thoughts, believes, likes, or desires you have, they're no worse or better than mine. I'm not going to feel better, or worse about myself based on this. I will talk to you like I talk to a friend, and if you hurt me, that's on you buddy, I'll be alright, but my conscience is clear. And I'm done being shy, it'll probably take some work but.. why? All I'm doing is hurting myself. I'm missing out in chances of getting to know some really amazing people, like I did with Millie. And that just won't do. Not anymore. 

So.. that's all for me. What about you? What are you thankful for? And what will you improve? Take a good look at yourself. Be critical. It'll hurt, but.. that's the first step to being a better us. Millie, I didn't know you, really, and I'm sorry for this. But thank you. This taught me a lot of things, and for this.. I'm going to try to be a better me. So even though I didn't know you, you've just made a big impact in my life. And for that, I thank you ever so much. To the rest of you, again, I beg you, take this seriously, let Millie's life, whether you knew her, or not, teach us all a lesson. A lesson that we should never take things for granted. People for granted. You never know when they'll be gone. 

Credits:

Skin: Essences - Sash skin for Collabor88 (opens tomorrow!)

Hair: [LeLutka]-DULCINA hair - Praline

Eyelids: Slink Mesh Lids and Lashes

Lipstick: ROZENA/ Juicy Tint(t) ~ cheeese

Tattoo: !Fablab! Believe Tattoo

Top: Tee*fy Milena Ruffle Blouse White

Skirt: Tee*fy Odette Skirt Black/Metallic Sliver

Bracelet: Noodles - Fairy Tale Charm Bracelet Gold v2

Pose: !bang - stand 321