O Captain, My Captain- Depression and Farewells.

I struggled for a long time on trying to figure out a good post to make after Robin Williams passed away. I didn't want to make something that was just for doing it, or writing it, I wanted my words and picture to represent something, to be meaningful. Be warned, the post below will contain personal information, and a look into what depression feels like, and why it's important to be aware of this deadly disease, because yes, it is a disease. If you're bothered by either of these themes, this might not be the post for you. 

Robin Williams' death hit me hard, I'm not going to lie, I still cry about it. A lot of people think it's ridiculous, since I didn't know him, but that's the point. We never took the time to get to know the selfless man that gave us laughs and filled our childhood with warm memories. He needed us, and we turned our backs. We didn't see the signs. We lost him too soon. This is what saddens me the most, and having been in that same boat, and having been saved, just, it's devastating. He was a legend. He was one of a kind. The world truly is a little less funny and bright, but as we've seen around, you're free. You're free from the chains of this world, from the guilt, and the hurt, free to be the you you've always desired to be, and to laugh freely like you made us laugh so many times. Rest in peace.

The thing that kills me though, is that not enough light is being shined upon how horrible depression is. He wasn't selfish. One of his last acts was sending a woman overseas a video of himself because meeting him was on her bucket list. He tried to make her laugh in his most desperate moment. If you haven't been through depression, I want you to take away all those thoughts that he was selfish, that sadness is just something you can cure. Get them out of your head right now, and clear them out. This is what depression feels like.

One day, there is something that happens, devastating, or maybe it's been going for a while, bringing lower and lower every day, or perhaps it came alone, suddenly. Regardless, it feels as if you're carrying a boulder on your back. You can't stand up, physically it hurts. Emotionally it hurts. There's a void in your heart, or inside you, it feels like ice. It hurts. It physically freezes you, and it hurts. But you have to keep going. Life goes on. This great boulder on your back, you can't take it off, you have to walk with it all day long, drag yourself step by step. People stare. You know they're talking about you. Not only are they talking about you, it feels like they're adding weight to this great boulder you have to carry. But you can't stop. No. If you stop, then they'll pile more on top of you. You have to run. You have to get away. And finally you do. For a moment you're free. You cry, you let it out. But the weight is still there. You talk to someone you trust, but the weight is still there, even if they have taken a couple of pebbles away from you. 

The day is over. Now is time to head home. Your loved ones are there. They stare at you. It huts. You're hurting them. You know they can see the boulder you're carrying, and they want to take it away from you. They want to carry it for you, but they can't get it off, they say only you can. But you've tried. Desperation sets in. You can't do anything. You're helpless to this great weight that you carry behind you. You can see this boulder growing, and it's going to crush your family too. No. It can't. It's your burden to carry. So you lock yourself up. Withdraw from others. That way, if they can't see you, you can't hurt them. They can't hurt you. It's good, right? No. Your family complains that you hide away. They're worried about you. The internet, your only outlet for freedom, makes fun of you. They "troll" you. You can't do it anymore. The weight is so heavy that it feels like you're suffocating. There must be an end. There must be a way to run away from the pain. You think, and there is. You go online and you find you're not alone. There are others, some urge you to go for help, others give you tips on how to end your suffering. You're at a crossroads now. But you've seek help. The doctors threw around illnesses at you that you knew you didn't have. You knew exactly what you had. Depression. The pills didn't help. You're screaming and they don't hear. Reach for the rope, it's time to end it all. 

This is what depression feels like. This is the road that many have walked. Some have survived. Some have perished and lost their battle with depression. I say to you, please. If you've ever felt like this. If you feel like this right now. Seek help. When you end your life, and that boulder is off your shoulders, it will attach to others around you. It's not worth it. You're not saving anyone. Go to someone, talk, eventually, the rock will fall, pebble by pebble.

And to you all that are in the internet, stop being trolls. There is no excuse to be abusive to others. To you all that find pleasure in humiliating others and shielding under the veil of anonymity, I beg you. Stop. Some of you have attacked me, with my daughter, and it hurts. You all know where to go to make the dagger stick. It's sickening. I'm glad I'm strong enough to only be mildly hurt by it, strong enough to know that you need more help than I do. But I will also say this. One day, one of those hateful messages you write will end a life. You will be the reason, the last drop, the last pebble, the last ounce of required weight that it took that person to be driven to insanity, and to do such a horrible thing. Don't be that person. Instead of attacking, lend a help, help them, they need your help. Instead of ending a life, save a life. 

Let's not forget Robin Williams, let's carry his memory in our hearts, share his gift with others, and use his last act as a lesson on how to be a better human being. On how you're not alone if you're depressed, and how you hurt the world once you're gone. It doesn't solve problems, it creates more. Let's all be a shoulder for others to cry, let's be humans, and take the monsters and devils out of us. Let's help someone that needs it today.

Credits:

Hair: + Lamb. Pandora - Variety/Ombre/Eccentric by Lamb Bellic at Collabor88

Skin: Lara Hurley-Fae Milky Fatpack by Lara Hurley 

Glasses: ISON - pegley glasses (tortoise) by Harry Hyx

Necklace: Lark - Sweet Dreams Kitty Necklace by Sienia Trevellion 

Top: -tb- Banded Cropped Top - Vintage by Julliette Westerburg

Skirt: *BOOM* Athena Skirt Long  Pitch by Aranel Ah at Collabor88

Hands: Slink Hands by Siddean Munro

Body: Slink Physique by Siddean Munro

Shoes: -Pixicat- Royal.Shoe (Pink) by areve

Feet: Slink High Feet by Siddean Munro

Pose: Little Hearts from {.:exposeur:.} by Rubystarlight Writer 

Big Girls Cry

Okay, so obviously I'm obsessed with doing pictures lately. Which is good, I guess i just haven't had time lately for it, and I'm finally able to, and it's just.. overload of prettiness. That and I've learned some new editing techniques that just make me excited to do pictures as well. I don't know. Also, blame Sia, her music inspires me to do pictures. If you haven't heard her new album, you really should, her voice is completely amazing, and her lyrics truly move you.

At any rate. I just put this look together by randomly trying things on from my huge inventory that I didn't even know I had. I completely love the look, and the clock from Mandala is a nice little tough, it's in this round of Collabor88, and I'm absolutely in love with it! I do love Mandala and the realism of their pieces. It's just insane to me! So yeah, I had to pair it with one of their necklaces. Anyways. I hope you like today's look. Love and stuff <3

Credits:

Hair: [LeLutka]-CECILIA hair - BlondeFun By Thorra Charron 

Skin: [PF] Harley <Ivory> - FATPACK by Mochi (mochi.milena) (Includes Lipgloss, and eye shadow)

Freckles: NOX. Sunspots [Three] by Hadley Steiner (olyvia.stratten)

Eyebags: Nox. Eyebags [Light] by Hadley Steiner (olyvia.stratten)

Eyes: .tsg. Mori Eyes - Ice Blue R (small shine) by ⓢⓤⓖⓐⓡⓟⓛⓤⓜ (eilfie.sugarplum)

Lashes: *MC* "Falsies" Eyelash - Upper+Lower by Ŧгєуα (freya.olivieri)

Necklace: Choker_B [MANDALA] by Nyorai_Gold by 菊之介王子 (kikunosuke.eel)

Dress: Emery - Mesh Maxi Dress Marie Nite by Sun (sunami.beck)

Watch: (complete/LEATHER) [MANDALA]BILLIONAIRE_Fashionista(white) By Nyorai_Gold by 菊之介王子 (kikunosuke.eel) @ Collabor88

Hands: Slink Avatar Enhancement Hands - Relaxed by Siddean Munro

Nails: A:S:S - SLINK avatar enhancement system nails - Serenata by Pho Vinternatt (photos.nikolaidis)

Pose/Chair: Trompe Loeil Wrought Iron Patio Chair  ~ Plain by Cory Edo 

When you're alone, Silence is all you'll know.

So I think everyone in Sl knows that I have a tiny addiction to Doctor Who (It's actually bigger on the inside, though) And I've been listening to the soundtrack all these days while working. Welp. Sorry tho. But this song always hits home, maybe it's because this episode is such a beautiful one. You know.. The Christmas Carol, with Abigail, And the Scrooge like old man that had his memory changed forever. I cry so hard at the ending, and let's face it, the doctor marrying Marilyn was also pretty hilarious. But the lyrics, and the beautiful melody of this song, with the magic on it, and all of it. Blahhhh. So anyways, I was going around SL, and I felt pretty, and I decided to make this picture. Basically, and share it and blog it, because.. why not? Collab is amazing. Go buy all the things, kay?

Also, the shoes are for a very special event. <3 Ulaa. It's a special fundraiser to help one of our own residents go home to see her mom along with her son. Her mom is dying from cancer, and it just hit close to home for so many reasons. I'm partaking in the event, along with some other great designers, like Enfant Terrible, these shoes work with Slink High Feet, and are only 250L, and are just gorgeous. I was left speechless, just had to buy it. Anyways! They're trying to reach for 200USD, so let's all work together and help her get there! If you want to donate personally, you can also do so http://www.gofundme.com/atht7w or just shop at the great event, starting tomorrow! Any little bit helps.

Credits:

Skin: -Glam Affair - Cassia skin - America by Aida Ewing 

Hair: Exile::Letters and lipstick by Kavar Cleanslate at Collabor88

Body: Slink Physique Body by Siddean Munro

Dress: Tee*fy Aphrodite Dress XS Teal by Azure Electricteeth at Collabor88

Hands: Slink Avatar Enhancement Hands - Relaxed - XSmall by Siddean Munro

Shoes: .Enfant Terrible. <3 Ulaa heels for <3 Ulaa

Feet: Slink Female Feet (AvEnhance) XS - High by Siddean Munro

Pose: !Bang by Luna Jubilee

The Killer in Me is the Killer in You

I adore this round of Collab! Like.. absolutely mad about it. I love everything nautical, and the designers didn't fail to deliver in this theme. I'm feeling a little nostalgic today, so I decided to go for a darker mood picture, since.. like.. if you know anything about me, my pictures highly reflect my current mood. I guess that's why I love blogging so much, it's therapeutic to make a picture, let out your emotions, listen to some good tunes, and share your thoughts. I mainly enjoy doing pictures though, I love art, and being able to edit my art work makes me a happy person. Also, I got a new graphics card. Water looks beautiful. I didn't know it could look like that. Can you tell I'm a happy camper about that?

At any rate, I wanted to share some of the cute things available this round of collabor88, say hi, kinda forget about work for a day, and do a pretty picture. I'm gonna go to the credits before I ramble too much. You all enjoy!

Credits:

Skin: -Glam Affair- Liv skin- Asia by Aida Ewing for The Arcade

Hair: Clawtooth: Under the Sea - Girl Next Door by Bubbles Clawtooth for Collabor88

Hat: LaGyo_Pirate queen hat - Black by Gyorgyna Larnia for Collabor88

Eyeliner: [KOOQLA] Z-eyeliner (Black) 03 by Rocketta Haven

Lipstick: [KOOQLA] Domino Lips 02 by Rocketta Haven

Earrings: LaGyo_Pirate earring & Rose Gold by Gyorgyna Larnia for Collabor88

Neck Tattoo: "Jim"-Cunning Tattoo by Celeste Forwzy

Necklace: LaGyo_Pirate necklace Gold by Gyorgyna Larnia for Collabor88

Top: Tee*fy Isobel Tank XS Black by Azure Electricteeth for Collabor88

Body Tattoo: Paperbag. Body of Roses Tattoo by Kex Blackheart

Bracelet: Wimey: Scholarly Bracelet by Sash Arabello

Jeans: [Cynful] Skinny Jeans - Blue by Cynthia Ultsch

Shoes: fri. - Wayfaring.Sandals (Charcoal) by Darling Monday for Collabor88

Pose: Marukin- Frais

*Slink Hands and flat feet worn in this picture. 

**Picture taken at this location

Coming Home.

It's been a long time since I've been here. Sometimes I miss it. Right now I honestly do. Sometimes I get carried away, and think that I want to be with others, and then when I do, something happens, and I realize that it's better to be the hermit that I am. I've been that way for a reason. I don't know how many times I have to hit myself against the same wall before I finally learn. So I've come home. Even if it is for a short while with all the changes coming. God only knows where the wind will take me, but this is for sure, I'll be in charge of where it goes.

To those that brought the drama against me, thank you. You've waken me up. I'm going to plurge my life. Start a new. Go back to the person I am, the one that I like, the one that I'm comfortable with. And to those that try to hate on that, I don't give a crap anymore. I cared too much, I got close to too many of you, and forgot that in the internet, the soul factor is lost. It's like being back in High School, a social climb after another, step over the other to look better, and don't care about the damage. I never did well in High School, it's always taken something major for me to walk away from those that I care about. This is it. No going back. Too many attempts, and it always ends the same. I'm very sorry it has to be that way. I guess from now on I'm coming to sl to do the few things that I love. Creating, photography, and shopping. 

To put the rumors to rest. I barely get blogger packs. The people that I "blog" for, they know my situation, they know sometimes it gets tough for me to do things. I've never done blogging for the free things. I've done it because I love taking pictures. I love sharing. I love opening pieces of myself I'm not comfortable sharing in the real world. I do blogging because I love it. I miss it when I'm designing. But I guess bills have to be paid. And as a designer, I'll be fully transparent with this. Why don't we send out blogger samples to groups? For quality control, for one. There are events with more than 3 times the amount of bloggers. I share with those whose work I enjoy, and let others shop. Nothing personal, but I have to make a living myself. Secondly, because we already have a blogger group, and we need to make a living. Sure, it sounds rough, and crude, but it's the truth. I don't go around asking for free stuff, I spend way too much money in SL, and out of the very few things that I do get for free, I'm very thankful, and try to showcase them at least in a plurk to give some sort of notoriety. I feel guilty receiving free stuff, and even with friends, if I want something they've made, I buy it. The rumors of me making that stupid plurk are ridiculous. That's all I have to say about it. I've shown proof it wasn't me. Now I'm saying my peace about it. I hope the topic dies, it's been very hurtful. I have fallen jaded towards a lot of my friends. I honestly can't deal with them at the moment, the thought that they would help the rumor grow, instead of ask me about it, help me figure it out, and whisper behind my back is heart breaking. The fact that they believed it so blindly, and wrongly, just breaks me. I still cry about that, I"m not going to lie. It's been a rough couple days, I've even lost my desire to work. So I hope that's the end of this. 

In hopes of you that don't know me too well, to know me a bit better, and hopefully stop something like this to spread in the future, I've decided to do Berry's meme. So let's give it a try. And guys.. I'm not a terrible person. I have my moments, my flares of anger, my moments of annoyance. I'm human. But please, in the future, isntead of sitting there gossiping about me. Come to me. Ask me, let's save the heart ache. And if it happens to someone else, I hope this is a learning experience of how to handle it. I know for me it is. Not that I would ever accuse a friend that I know wouldn't do it, much less without asking. You defend friends, not back stab them. 

When and how did you discover Second Life? – 2006. Old boyfriend who fell for my best sl friend. GO FIGURE! 

Did you know about virtual worlds before or was this your first experience with them? – I didn't. I used to roleplay in boards, but it was fun to change over to SL where it was more interactive. 

Has Second Life met your expectations? – I didn't have any, so I suppose it has?

If you could teleport back to the first ten minutes of your avatar’s slife, what would you tell yourself? – DO NOT PUT YOUR CREDIT CARD IN, YOU CRAZY COLLEGE STUDENT YOU. 

How long did it take you to master avatar flying and driving vehicles inworld? – I got flying down fast. I used to only get around flying. Drivng.. idk.. it took a while since I didn't do it when I first got into sl, when I was given a vehicle, I already knew how to move around sl. 

Do you have a mystery alt? – I wish I did! But no. I'm too open, and the few times I've tried it, I say it's me. 

Is your SL avatar a reflection of you, or someone you wished you could be? – Fully me, the emotions are real, the behavior is me, it's all of me. I guess that's why I fall so hard with my friends, and get hurt so easily . 

Is there an individual you met in SL that inspired you in your RL? How? So many! I just can't think of any off the top of my head, but many. 

Do you feel it is easier to create stronger bonds/relationships with people you meet inworld as opposed to the real world? – It's about the same I suppose. 

Did you ever imagine or believe people could fall in love with someone they never met before Second Life? – I didn't, but I have. 

How has your perspective of dating changed (or not) since you started playing second life? –Nope. 

How has your perspective of employment changed (or not) since you started playing second life? – Yes, I never thought I'd have to work out of sl, and actually make enough to do alright in my real life and pay for my medical needs. It's awesome. 

Name three things in both your lives that overlap each other significantly. – work, feelings, growth. 

If you could live your life more immersively in a virtual world, would you? (Kind of like the Matrix) – Oh gosh no. 

How do you think behavior changes for people if they’re inworld vs in real world? Why do you think that is? – People are rude online because they don't have to deal with the consequences of their actions. Much harder to be rude when you can see the effect it has on someone. 

How has second life consumerism changed your perception of spending habits, the value of money, the need to be “bleeding edge” with fashion?– I'm a shopaholic and do terrible with money. Then, now and always. But it did give me a fashion sense. 

Do you think virtual worlds like SL drive and redefine human interaction or do they narrow and limit it? – I think they broaden it and help people with fears like me, though sometimes that's a double edged sword. 

If technology progressed tomorrow to allow you to send emotions to people the way you’d send text or voice messages, would it enrich your SL experience or infringe on it? – It would be awesome. Maybe less people would be rude, and people would start behaving like humans online. 

Name three skills you attribute to having learned or honed in second lifealone. – 3d creation, photoshop, and fashion sense. 

If your grand kids googled your Second Life Avatar’s name, would they be intrigued, disgusted, proud or something else? – I hope they would be proud of the things that I've managed to accomplish despite my handicaps. 

So that's about it, I hope you guys enjoy it, happy arcade, and, let's go to the credits:

Skin: -Glam Affair- Liv skin- Asia for the Arcade 

Hair: Clawtooth: Boardwalk Breeze - Red eye flight for the Arcade

Eye make up: [KOOQLA] Z-eyeliners (Black)

Lipstick: [KOOQLA] Domino Lips 02

Uniform: .the sugar garden. Academy Uniform - Black Cardigan

Glasses: Intrigue Co. - Twitterpated Shades: Red for Collabor88

Cellphone: .the sugar garden. Keitai Smart Phone Sweets Decoden RARE for Arcade

Socks: .Atomic. Scout Stockings - Pluto 

Shoes: Schadenfreude Slink GooGooMuck Heel for Collabor88

Cat pet:  *MishMish* Traveler Kitty - RARE for Arcade 

Pose: Del May- Minimal Effort. 

Home Decor:

Trompe Loeil - Aeronaut Chair Fawn & Natural- 3 LI for The Men's Dept.

Rug-O-Rama Gacha "joystick" Rare - even.flow - 2 LI

Apple Fall Interior Plant - 1 LI

*MishMish* Kitty in Paris - 1 LI for the Arcade

Trompe Loeil - Vintage End Table Black - 2 LI for the Arcade

The Loft - Bacall Accesory Tray -1 LI

The Loft - Bacall Bowl of Roses Red- 3 LI

Apple Fall Bow Tie Art- 1 LI

Trompe Loeil - Aeronaut Chair Plum & Fawn - 3 LI

*Fishy Strawberry* Barcelona Bag Black (hand)

Color.Me.H.O.F Mesh [Duffel Bag[Vintage]

Dutchie Philodendron tall - 2 LI

The Loft - Manhattan Picture - 1 LI

The Loft - Vogue 1930 picture - 1 LI

The Loft - New York picture - 1 LI

Lark - Inara Lamp (Earth) 2 LI

Lark - Inara Lamp (Sky) 2 LI

Lark - Inara Lamp (Sea)2 LI

Fix You

Recently I don't know why, but I've been feeling more down than usual. I guess it's just the date, and being afraid. God only knows. But as the fear comes, just you feel more isolated from people. Even if it's not true. Even if you're the person alienating yourself. It's an odd feeling to have, and I guess lately I've been longing to reach out to someone, bahhhh. Feelings suck. Fear sucks. Doctors suck. Yeah, I think that's the moral of the story. Everything just urgh. Then when I hear this song I want to cry, because it's like an anthem to myself kinda deal, just.. I don't know. My thoughts are very mumbled tonight. I am so sorry. But anywaysssss

I put up a cute outfit that goes with the way I'm feeling right now. Just... left alone, and scared and blah. Whatever, pretend the words to this post don't suck. Please? Sounds like a deal <3 Anyways, let's just go on to the credits because I can't think for the life of me.

Credits:

Skin: -Glam Affair - Mokatana skin - America 04 @ Collabor88 (Aida Ewing)

Hair: [elikatira] Leighann - Essentials (Elikapeka Tiramisu)

Headband: Noodles - Bearmuffs Strawberry (Natalee Oodles)

Glasses: ISON - pegley glasses (tortoise) (Harry Hyx) 

Tattoo: "Jim"-Cunning Tattoo (Celeste Fowrzy)

Necklaces: .Olive. the Mine! Zodiac Necklace - Sagittarius [Gold].

.Olive. the Folded Golden Paper Letter Necklace - S (Naminaeko Resident)

Bracelet L: [tea.s] Regal Gem Bracelet Silver - Pure for Fantasy Collective (Tea Soup)

Bracelet R: Wimey: Wisdom of a Madman Bracelet (VIP Gift) (Sash Arabello)

Top: {mon tissu} Joy Tee - Mon Tissu Soiree VIP Gift (Anouk Spot)

Overalls: [monso] My Overall - Dark Blue (Morphine Janick)

Shoes: fri. - Lovegood.Heels (Black) (Darling Monday)

Pose: Marukin - Triple Tea

Alien

So, there's two things in my agenda today before I head into the oblivion that sucks out my life that we call here "the hospital". I'm going to be gone for a little bit, I hope, but just in case, I wanted to do one last blog post before heading out, just because I missed working on pictures really, and there are two things that stole my attention today. First off...

Monday Meme. Oh, and Berry. It's after midnight. Hence... I did do the blog in time. You know. On Monday. UNLIKE SOME OF US. Kidding. I have nothing but love for that wonderful mango loving woman. But today, it's all about what huds and what not we use in SL in order to make it easier to take pictures. So Im posting my raw shot with the things that I use in here so you can see what my interface is when I take pictures. And just why the heck I lag out so much.

1. Anypose: Berry blogged this one too but it's just that amazing, okay? It lets you control your eyes, no more blinking while taking pics, and it lets you have facial expressions if you want too. Amazeballs.

2. Animare: How many times have you gotten your hand stuck in your skirt, or something? It majorly sucks! And it's like.. 30 minutes AT LEAST to properly fix in photoshop, or do the layering trick with PS where you have to take more than one shot. But let's face it, it takes away from your shadows, and it messes up everything in the world. 

3. Kokopelli HUD: This HUD is actually free, and though I'd like to be able to organize it, let's be honest like.. I never will, I'd rather just endless scroll through there if I'm out taking a picture and let people laugh at me. I think that HUD has about 200 poses, and still no where even near the cap.

4. Phototools. It comes in Firestorm, and I use it to do a quick shot with shadows, most of the time I'll just layer that shot on top of this one, and just keep the shadows, saves me time and what not. And I love that phototools just lets you adapt everything graphic wise in one little window. Makes firestorm my go to place for pictures, even though it's laggier. 

My second theme of the day has to do with... well. .feeling alienated, really. It's no secret that I used to be a huge rp'er. I miss it to this day, so so much, but with blogging and designing, I just don't have time for anything anymore. But I still do have a twitter account, where I follow some of my old friends that rp. Sometimes it's hilarious, and I wonder really if I used to look that crazy rp'ing, because, I swear, as an outsider reading these, you'd think this is a bad episode of some badly scripted reality show.

But here's the thing though, I was looking there, and came across something that I personally found offensive. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything, but at any rate I did. I said that it was offensive, and their reply was "Oh, it's just an rp post. I'm fat too". I had to stop for a second. Hold on. So let me get this straight. The fact that you're rp'ing makes it okay to be insulting towards others? Or post things that can be insutling? And why does it matter your size, or color, or anything? I honestly think, it's like the "n" word. If you don't want other people calling you it, then you shouldn't call others of your race it either. Just.. no. It's wrong. At least I feel that way. So I have to wonder now.. just.. where do we draw the line?

Putting aside the second issue, let's focus on how far can we go with our words and actions to be offensive, and still be okay with it being just a character. My belief is, if you say it, you feel at least in a part inside of you that it's true. Regardless of a character or not, you're giving credibility to the problem. Now, there are other people aside of you that read that, people that don't rp, people that don't know even what rp is. And when they read these things, they take it to heart. You hurt them. Even while rp'ing. Your actions and words ic can break someone oocly. Now.. it might just be me, I don't know. Maybe I've just been away from RP for too long now, but this is genuinely how I feel. So I just have to pose this question.. just how far is too far on what we say in an RP account?

Credits:

Skin: -Glam Affair - Mokatana skin - America 04 @ Collabor88 (Aida Ewing)

Hair: [e] Richelle - Essentials (Elikapeka Tiramisu)

Eyes: IKON Promise Eyes - Ice (Ikon Innovia)

Glasses: ISON - pegley glasses (tortoise) (Harry Hyx)

Necklace: Wimey- Lady Mary's Pearls- Lingering Spring @ Seasons Story (Sash Arabello)

Shirt: The Secret Store - Mary Pleated Shirt - Milk @ Collabor88 (Maylee Oh)

Skirt: Tee*fy Edela Buttoned Skirt Mint (Azure Electricteeth)

Purse: *{Junbug}* Princess Clutch in Pearl [Relaxed Hold] @ Collabor88 (Juno Mantel)

Shoes: [AUX] Footwear - Heartbreaker  - Seafoam (Crushed Clarity)

Pose: !Bang Stand 320 (Luna Jubilee)

The Cold Never Bothered Me Anyway

Gosh, I'm so totally obsessed with this movie, and the song, and anything frozen. Just.. urgh. Can we say just amazing above perfection one of my favorite Disney movies ever just.. URGH.

It's funny because I really identify with Elsa. In the relationship of my sister and me. When we were younger, I actually dropped her in the head, Debs now has a lightning scar on her forehead, and I just.. withdrew from her after that, so seeing this movie was just so emotional, because for the longest time, the relationship that Elsa and Anna had, was that of my sister and me. Needless to say, I cried like a baby. But it's Disney, it's a given that I would cry like crazy.

Any who, on to the fashion, yes? I've been really busy desning lately, and going to doctors, so I haven't really had the time to blog as much as I used to, and it's killing me, I adore blogging, sharing my thoughts, likes, and pictures with you all, but it's soooo hard at times! URGH. I'm hoping that post surgery next week I can do a home shoot, I love those, just.. time is a killer really. So..

The crown, I actually made, it's Lord of the Rings inspired for the Fantasy Gacha Carnival. And since I can't get Frozen out of my mind, I kinda threw it in with an Elsa ish inspired look. The blow dress is from Junbug, along with the shawl, from Collabor88. It's truly magnificent, and this picture doesn't even do it justice. The skin and mesh eyeliner are from Glam Affair, in the Cosmetic Fair, I really adore the eye make up on thsi skin, and eyeliner is a weakness of mine in SL, the unique shape of it really makes it something, I love it. Anyways, hope you enjoyed this little quick blog post. On to the credits. Allons-y!

Credits:

Skin: -Glam Affair - Mokatana - Artic 07 C @ Cosmetics Fair by Aida Ewing

Hair: !lamb. Shelia (Mesh) - Butterscotch by Lamb Bellic

Mesh Eyeliner: Glam Affair - Tiffany Liner Black @ Cosmetics Fair by Amberly Boccaccio

Eyes: IKON Promise Eyes - Ice (S) by Ikon Innovia

Crown: Wimey: The Wraith Crown RARE for Fantasy Gacha Carnival (Feb 1st) by Sash Arabello

Necklace: Glam Affair - Chainedlink Necklace Black/Gold @ Collabor88 by Amberly Boccaccio

Shawl: Junbug: Vintage Fur Wrap in Silver - S @ Collabor88 by Juno Mantel

Dress: Junbug: Instant Crush in Steel Blue - S @ Collabor88 by Juno Mantel

Pose: Del May- Sophisticated 1 by Del May

And We'll Never Be Royals

So I loooooove this song, Royals, like.. the more I listen to it, the more listen to it, the more I obsess with it, and throughout my hospital stay, that's literally all I could play in my phone. I think I made my husband sick. Soz. Not soz, really. 

Anyways, I went to Collab, and that's all I could think when I saw the amazing stuff that the designers did this round. Can we please talk about the lightbulbs that Tegan Serin did from floorplan? I'm dying a little, and you can change them to any metal you want. Bronze, gold, silver, platinum, and charcoal. The textures are lovely, whenyou turn them on they don't look like a hot glow mess, and they're just fabulous. Then you have Trompe, and I adore these chairs, and the chandelier.. urgh. It's so classy, but not royal, it's just my style. The cat though, that's Sway's release for FLF, so.. make sure to grab it today while you can, so adorable, and unique, it's a cute must have piece. The rug is from Lark, and well, the scene just needed a cute rug to pull the look together, I think. 

For clothing, I did all from Collab, the shoes are fri.day, and they're adorable, point heels, and with a cute little emblem on the side, can't really see it, but it's adorable, and works with Slink feet. The skirt is from Tres Blah, it has a minor problem with the rigging though, so when you sit, the studs, and the skirt sometimes go different ways, I noticed, it's a little on the annoying side, but for standing, it's the most adorable skirt ever. And the top is also from Tres Blah, and it's just soooo cute, I can't live without it. The necklace is new from Yummy, and seriously, they never cease to amaze me, it's so elegantly understated that it's just hte perfect piece to pull off the theme. New hair by Bubbles Clawtooth too. I adoooore Clawtooth hair, possibly because I'm a little obsessed with Bubbles and how fabulous he is, but.. also because the textures are always more.. I don't even know how to call it, it's got more of the indie vibe that I love in my styles, and for some reason I'm digging weird colors lately, so I stuck with the Princess Bubblegum color, but.. yeah, I adore this hair style! 

So, that's my Royals inspired style, mostly from this Collabor88 round! Make sure to get it all because.. this round is truly amazing!

Credits:

Skin: Essences - Lily Doux *blonde* Available Soon.

Hair: Clawtooth: Heart Attack and Vine - Princess Bubblegum for Collabor88

Freckles: [okkbye] Serious Full Body Freckles  2.0 - Pale

Nails/Hands: Slink Avatar Enhancement Hands - Relaxed with A:S:S - SLINK avatar enhancement system nails - Black on Black

Necklace: (Yummy) Metal and Diamonds - Day for Collabor88

Top: -tb- Banded Cropped Top - Vintage for Collabor88

Skirt: -tb- Studded Skirt - Black for Collabor88

Shoes: fri. - Amelia.Heels (Charcoal) for Collabor88

Pose: Del May - Hotness

Chandelier: Trompe Loeil - Industrial Chandelier Medium (11 LI) for Collabor88

Chairs: Trompe Loeil - Industrial Lounger Ice and Fawn (3 LI each) for Collabor88

Rug: Lark - Reyk Rug - Snow (2 LI)

Cat Lamp: Sway's Lamp [meow] unplugged - pink (1 LI) for FLF

Eiffel Tower Lamp: floorplan. eiffel tower marquee (1 LI) for Collabor88

Wall Lighting: floorplan. industrial lighting (6 LI each) for Collabor88

Welcoming Fall- Preview of a Couple Season Story Things!

So I know a lot of people are getting a little event-ed out, meaning there are so many events in SL that it's almost like it's pointless to go to the main store, just because designers get into so many events that they forget to do releases for their store. I feel you, I feel like that a lot of the times, however, I do still love a good event because it lets me see the creativity of designers, along with discovering new places and stores that other wise I probably wouldn't have known about. So, that brings me to this new event named Seasons Story. It's amazing cute, and I just adore it, it's got a lot of the bigger Japanese/Asian brands, but still has some main stream stores like Floor Plan and Wasabi Pills in it! I just love everything about this, the set up, the idea, the items, the quality, and the feel to this event, so... well done, it's a home run in my opinion. 

I decided to do two different looks just because there's so much I want to show you guys, and I wanted to start today, I originally wanted to do more looks for this post, but I'm going to have to divide it, too many amazing things to go through. I have to say that also the pose makers did a fabulous job this event, it gave me so much inspiration for pictures, so.. to everyone in this event, thank you, you've given me so much to work with that I'm actually overwhelmed by inspiration! Now on to the looks and the slurl so you can go and check out this amazing new event because.. trust me,you really don't want to miss out on all this fabulousness! 

Credits:

Picture 1:

Skin: Essences - Sash *peche* brunette (Coming Soon)

Hair: tram  C409 hair / brown (size40)

Freckles: [PXL] FullBody freckles

Moles: Essences - Beauty Marks

Top: tram -gathered shoulder blouse(MESH)[navy] for Season Story

Jeans: {mon tissu} Denim - 1929 Cigarette ~ Gray

Boots: ISON - cult riding boots (black) for Collabor88

Pose: .::Kirin Poses::. Autumn Leaves Pose & Prop for Season Story

Picture 2:

Skin: Izzie's - Katya Skin brown pale GB Fr CL for Season Story

Hair: /Wasabi Pills/ Akiko Mesh Hair - Chocolate for Season Story

Top: B.C.C Breakfast At Tiffany's knit Black for Season Story

Undershirt: [W&B] Cole Boatneck Top TAUPE GREY

Skirt: :pesca:cotton lace skirt white/ for Season Story

Shoes: [Gos] Boutique - FlipFlops - Black

Pose: MODEL POSES -  Martina for Season Story

I Used to be a Fashionista Like You...

Another Monday is upon us, and another meme by Berry. Now.. personally, I like those that force us to be creative, and this week did just that.. welp. We had to make a meme, into a meme, for a meme post.. if that even makes sense? Memeception, basically. I thought for a while, and just.. poses make it difficult, and face in Sl, because.. let's face it, the little facial expression thing for SL basic shape sucks, and I'm not rich so I can't and won't buy a mesh head. I'd buy a sim before I do that. But anyways! I started to talk to people, and then I felt sad face, I was like.. if only I were a true fashionista like Berry, this wouldn't be an issue. Welp. Why not arrow to the knee meme? Score. And it's early enough that I can do this and be the original one that came up with it. I'm going to glare at someone if they did this too! But anways, there it is, my meme!

I am so in love with this Collab round guys! Fall! Fall stuff, I so so so love it. Secre store scallop sweater is to die for, I actually fat packed this and I rarely fat pack, and this cute little leather skirt from Tres Blah, just.. how adorbs is it?! I love it. I thought together they actually made a perfect ensamble, because truth be told, I didn't care much for the top that Tres Blah made this round.. I know.. shocker, it's one of the first things that she made that I didn't completely love. I paired off the look with shoes from Fri.day, just because.. the whole new shoe like Darling Monday is doing is just.. well.. darling, and I adore the fact that I can do the mesh feet with it and never have to take them off. And hair from Truth. Guys.. he's doing the whole pack of normals now, it's a little on the steep side, but.. I think more designers should get on this band wagon! I love having options for hair color and not having to buy in the future and rebuild my hair folder. Best.Idea.Ever.

Credits:

Skin: Essences ~ CHO ~ peche

Hair: TRUTH HAIR Lyma [Roots] - Blondes04

Freckles: [PXL] FullBody freckles

Moles: Essences - Beauty Marks

Sweater: The Secret Store - Scallop Sweater - Ash for Collabor88

Skirt: -tres blah- Leather skirt - Black for Collabor88

Arrow: [hC] Arrow to the knee (PROMO) 1L

Shoes: fri. - Jane.Heels (Black.Dots)

Pose: Del May - Melancholic flower

Misread

So Collab just opened, and this round left me.. well.. in shock! First off.. league is in there.. like.. can we all squeal, even if it's just a little bit? I didn't expect that one, huge shocker for me, and I couldn't be happier! That is just too awesome. They have this amazing little sweater dress with a color changing HUD belt thing that is jsut to die for.. like.. a fall must have, and Milk Motion? This over the top cape with the little hat/beanie/whatever the heck you want to call it. Yeah. Adore. But what really shocked me was that Belleza was there. Now, now.. don't be hating on me, but.. well.. how to put this and not make it sound bad because I'm half asleep? This round actually had a lot of new designers in it, that I really didn't expect, but with that they took away some of my favorite ones, and left some that I'm still scratching my head as to the reason why they're there, (Then again, personal taste has a lot to do with it I suppose) But.. all  of that aside, I was just rather shocked to see Belleza there, and pleasantly so when I saw this cute little skin there for only  188L.

Now, I'm THE pickiest person when it comes to skins, Birdy? I find it lacks definition in the skin, and sometimes it's got a weird shade to it, I don't even know how to explain it. Glam Affair? Too soft for my taste, and I find that a lot of her skins look the same, even though she's one of my favorite skin makers. Sue me, I have never been a huge Pink Fuel fan. And Skinnery? Nope. The Store? I actually don't know what people find so fascinating about this skin, and Lelutka? Love the hairs, their skins look weird to me around the bewbies. So.. yeah... Tell me a store, I can point out the flaws in their skins, there are few skins that have been a total hit with me, some are from Essences, no doubt, some from Glam Affair, and some from League. But... this?

I tried it on because SL kept eating my money, and I drooled a little, Shyla, you have outdone yourself with this skin, simple, soft and adorable. My one complain? Your HUD for the hands. I got a little frustrated at having to try to find which hand applier fit to it, but other than that, this is flawless. Love.

Credits:

Skin: -Belleza- Leila Pale 1 for Collabor88

Hair: . Liquence . - F3 in Genetics

Hat: (Milk Motion) veiled beanie - black for Collabor88

Eyes: IKON Ascension Eyes - Gray

Freckles: [PXL] FullBody freckles

Moles: Essences - Beauty Marks

Dress: *League* Etta Knit Dress -Oatmeal for Collabor88

Coat: (Milk Motion) wool cape - black for Collabor88

Pose: Del May - Orderly Queue 9 M

Slytherin' Up with a 42.

So it really shouldn't be a surprise that I love anything and everything Harry Potter. But.. well.. I should seriously change that. I don't love Harry Potter. I love the Death Eaters, and Voldemort, and the Malfoys, and Slytherin. So with school starting up, and also Mischief Managed about to start a new school year, I decided to do a small Slytherin look for my blog today, because.. I mean, why wouldn't I?

One of my favorite activities in Second Life is roleplaying. Before I got into blogging, and before I started to try to be a wanna be builder, all I did was roleplay. This goes back like.. Oh God guys.. 2006? I started out in Gor, like a lot of people, and then started moving towards either Hogwarts sims, or Urban sims. I still remember my first Hogwarts, with Harry Prefect and Darcy Ruthledge as owners. I met some amazing people there that I still keep in contact.. at times, I have to admit, I'm so shy at times I don't, but! I still keep in touch and love them, and have very fund memories of them. Now, I find myself in an awesome Hogwarts inspired sim, that is just so breath taking and well built, I guess it would be the closest thing to being in Hogwarts for real. I adore this sim, and I actually can't wait to be a part of the new school year! I'm going to be around amazing friends, new and old, and I think it's going to be fantastic. 

So.. I guess this ties in with the group meme that Berry posted this week, because as a blogger, wanna be builder, and a role player, juggling group spots is sooo hard! So I thought I'd give a crack at the meme this week. Here we go! 

Meme Instructions: Answer the following questions about groups and share some of your favs with us. Don’t forget to leave your link in the comments!

1. Have you reached the 42 group limit? Yup. All the time, regardless how many times I try to clean up! Welp.
2. Do you do a lot of group hopping to keep up with all the groups you want to stay a part of? Yup, it's the only way to try to be able to manage them, really.
3. What makes you want to join a group? Either they have to be a designer that I completely and totally love, a roleplay community I'm very active in, or blogger groups. With designers moving to subscriber style things that send you the item instead of you having to join a group it's starting to become easier to manage. Still though.. designers that don't use this system- PLEASE DO! Kay? Kay. I am so glad we had this talk.
4. A lot of store VIP groups have a group fee which you have to pay to join. How do you feel about paying group fees? I'm not a huge fan of group fees either. Though.. i guess.. at very few places it's worth it. The only two groups that I've joined that have group fees are Auxiliary, Mon Tissu, and Gos. The only reason is because the benefits surely do outweigh the cost. Though I'm starting to double thing about Mon Tissu, that was a hefty joining fee, and very little for it, I'll be honest. 
5. Name a few groups that you are a part of that you feel everyone should look into joining and share your reasons behind that.
   –>Mischief Managed - why? Because Harry Potter. Need I say more? I've always wanted to embark in my own Hogwarts story, and I finally get the chance to do it, so.. if you're an uber Harry Potter fan like I am.. join! But keep in mind.. Slytherin are the only cool people. If you're not Slytherin, you're really not part of the cool group. Specially if you're a badger. LOOKING AT YOU SCARLET CHANDRAYAAN!
   –> Auxiliary VIP group. You get free gifts often, and even though you have to pay a joining fee, Tyr and Ivy's designs are amazing. Love them.
   –> Noodles VIP group. Because.. Nat is an amazing jewelery designer, and she gives store credit for your purchases if you're wearing your VIP tag, and free group gifts. Just for a small joining fee. So of course it's worth joining!
   –> SLBlogger support if you're a blogger is a must! You get to keep up with the community and what's going on, and there's always someone there if you have questions, and they have a nifty little website that keeps up with everything blogger. Love that group.
   

So that's it for the 42 Blogger challenge..and.. don't forget to join Mischief Managed to become a Slytherin today! Big things will be happening soon! I promise. And don't join the Hufflepuff house. Badgers like to pretend they're cool.. but.. come on, really?

Credits:

Skin: Essences - Sash 01 ~ light rose ~ for Collabor88

Hair: Clawtooth: Angeles - Girl Next Door for Collabor88

Eyes: IKON Ascension Eyes - Gray

Freckles: [PXL] Face freckles (tattoo 2.x)

Moles: Essences - Beauty Marks

Lipstick: ROZENA/ Juicy Tint(t) ~ nude

Coat: (fashionably dead) Tweed Box Coat - Green for Collabor88

Ring: LaGyo_Sasha ring gold

Jeans: Maitreya Flare Jeans  #7

Shoes: fri. - Jane.Heels (Black)

Pose: Del May - Wait for me

White Blank Page

I feel like I haven't blogged in forever! So I wanted to do something brief, I've just been getting into so many shenanigans lately it's hard to keep up with it all! I'm starting to work on mesh more, so that means my work here has been suffering, and with mesh comes stress, and with stress comes a destressant or something, which has been hanging around Inka, who will now be writing with us here in the blog! HOORAY for that! I'm actually uber exciter for Inka joining in here and being my blogging partner, and just.. partner in everything, I love that girl's face, and i've also been rp'ing a little.. but.. never the less, I decided to share some more new goodies, some from collab, others are old things, others are just.. I love them and you'll have to deal okay? Good. 

So Lelutka, new hair, and it comes with a hat.. obviously the hat didn't go with the outfit, but I totally loved the hair, it has a very free flowing form, and even though the picture /is/highly/edited/ the hair is for sure worth going over and demo'ing it. I mean.. comes with a hat, come on! Then I totally love this suit from Ison.. it's totally adorable, and just.. so mainly in a feminine manner, I love the draping work and just.. amazing work. Then.. we have fri.day who re released a couple of heels of hers, and I'm just totally in love, I'm loving slink add on shoes now, guys, I thought I wouldn't but.. I have to admit, the look of them is just amazing. So.. that brings us to accessories, LaGyo is one of my favorite places for jewelry, it's eccentric, high fashion, and just me, and it's also affordable, this set, the one with the cuff, actually comes with an HUD that allows you to change the color of the pieces so you can match your cuff to the outfit, or just make a color palette that you enjoy. The tattoo is new, from Tenjin for the Acid Lily event, which basically is all new, and has a new line up, and I'm uber excited. The tattoo is in a mesh sleeve, so you don't have to have it repeat in both arms, I kind of loved that, to be honest, and it also has the tattoo option if you want it repeating. Finally we have accessories by Remarkable Oblivion, whom I love, duh! I believe the headband is free in a group gift, if you join the group, though it might have been taken down.. you'll have to check, but the group is free to join! That's it for today guys! Hope you all have a wonderful weekend. 

Credits:

Skin: Essences - Sash 01 ~ light rose ~ for Collabor88

Hair: [LeLutka]-GOGO hair - Pitch *newish*

Headband: RO - Diable Band - GG 

Eyes: IKON Ascension Eyes - Gray

Freckles: [PXL] Face freckles Medium (tattoo 2.x)

Moles: Essences - Beauty Marks

Lipstick: ROZENA/ Juicy Tint(t) ~ nude

Tattoo: Tenjin - Fairy Princess Tattoo for Acid Lily 

Cuff: LaGyo_Helen bangles Gold - SET B for Collabor88

Vest: ISON - razzle vest (black) for Collabor88

Top: Maitreya Bodysuit de la Ruche - White

Pants: ISON - razzle pleated pants (black) for Collabor88

Pin: RO - Insignia - KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON - Purchase Container

Shoes: fri. - Jane.Heels (Black) *New*

Hands: Slink Avatar Enhancement Hand Elegant 1 (Unpack)

Nails: *Fishy Strawberry* Slink Fingernails -Extreme French HANDS

Ring: LaGyo_Sasha ring gold

Pose: Del May - Flamingo fashionista